“At last, I became a teacher!”
When Seo E H. saw her name on the final list of successful applicants for the 2003 teacher certification exam, her joy was beyond words. Years of grueling study flashed through her mind like scenes from a movie. She stepped into her new career with a fierce determination: “Let me become the kind of true teacher I have always dreamed of being—a teacher who understands, cares for, and genuinely loves students.”
But reality quickly shattered her idealistic dreams. Within months, she was crying in frustration, battling a rebellious classroom, and dreading every upcoming Monday.
This is the story of how an overwhelmed, exhausted new teacher used meditation to uncover the hidden ego destroying her classroom, cure her severe burnout, and finally become the authentic educator she had always dreamed of being.
The Shock and Disappointment of the First Year
When Seo first met her middle school homeroom class, every single student felt incredibly lovable to her. She celebrated their birthdays, exchanged emails, counseled them, and reveled in the joy of finally having “her own class.”
But the honeymoon phase didn’t last. As time passed, the students began to resist her guidance. When she tried to discipline them, they responded with shocking rudeness and disrespect. Initially, she rationalized their behavior, convincing herself they were acting out because they knew she was an inexperienced rookie. She responded by becoming stricter, but her harshness backfired—the students only grew more rebellious.
The emotional distance between them widened into a chasm. She felt as though she had experienced an entire lifetime’s worth of teaching hardships in just one year. The constant disrespect left her completely discouraged. She blamed herself, often crying in sheer frustration, deeply ashamed that she could not embrace her students with a broad and understanding heart.
Uncovering the Hidden Need for Approval
Desperate for a lifeline, Seo attended a teacher training meditation retreat that winter. As she reflected on her life during her practice, painful memories began surfacing: being bullied by classmates in middle school, and the fresh trauma of being ignored and insulted by her current students.
Tears of sorrow and injustice poured out. But as she repeatedly discarded these painful mental images, she finally saw the absolute deepest layer of her own mind: she desperately wanted recognition.
She wanted every single student to like her. When they didn’t offer her the respect and affection she craved, her disappointment morphed into resentment, and she began disliking them in return. She realized she had caused her own suffering. Beneath her idealistic goal of being a “loving teacher” lay a fragile pride—the selfish desire to be recognized, validated, and praised by her classroom.
Curing the “Sunday Scaries”
As Seo discarded these false minds and her desperate need for approval one by one, a physical transformation occurred. The heavy, chronic pain she had constantly carried in her shoulders vanished. Both her body and mind felt incredibly light.
She realized that her true nature was actually vast and spacious, and a profound sense of gratitude replaced her frustration. If she had not experienced the brutal hardships of her first year, she never would have sought out meditation or experienced this absolute freedom.
As she entered her fifth year of teaching, her colleagues began noting her boundless energy. In the past, every Sunday evening was heavy and depressing as she dreaded returning to the battlefield of her classroom. Today, her mind remains unshakeably peaceful. Sunday nights feel relaxing, and Monday mornings feel genuinely joyful.
Becoming a Teacher Who Truly Understands
Her classroom dynamic shifted entirely. In the past, when students behaved badly, she would scold them emotionally simply to release her own hurt pride and frustration. Now, her guidance stems from a sincere, ego-free desire to help them.
Before, she judged her students, labeling them as “troublemakers” or “problem students,” and unconsciously treated them with hostility. Today, she simply sees and accepts them exactly as they are. She tries to understand every situation from the student’s perspective. Most remarkably, when she realizes she has made a mistake—even if the other person is just a young student—she respectfully and sincerely apologizes.
This profound internal shift even transformed her home life. Her youngest daughter, who used to complain and speak harshly, softened completely and now greets the family with a smiling face.
Free from unnecessary, self-centered thoughts, Seo’s concentration and teaching effectiveness have skyrocketed. She finally enjoys school life because she knows, without a doubt, that she is living as the true teacher she always dreamed of being.
Seo E H.’s 3 Insights on Overcoming Teacher Burnout
1. The Need for Approval Breeds Resentment “I thought I was suffering because my students were disrespectful. In reality, I was suffering because my ego demanded their praise and recognition. When you teach to be liked, every sign of teenage rebellion feels like a personal attack. Letting go of the need for approval is the only way to find peace in the classroom.”
2. Stop Labeling the Students “When you label a child a ‘troublemaker,’ you unconsciously project hostility toward them, and they will absolutely rebel against it. When you empty your mind of those prejudiced labels, you can finally accept them as they are and guide them with genuine care.”
3. True Authority Includes Humility “I used to think being strict was the only way to handle a class. But I learned that respectfully apologizing to a student when you are wrong doesn’t destroy your authority—it builds unbreakable trust. Everything in teaching depends on discarding your own mind and ego.”
