For over a decade, Kyung L., a professional at the National Health Insurance Service (Pohang Nambu Branch), harbored a deep, quiet hatred toward a female coworker. She tried repeatedly to control her mind and suppress her frustration, but nothing worked.
Then, one day, she approached that same coworker and said something unimaginable: “I am truly sorry when I think about how much emotional pain I caused you.”
The coworker was absolutely stunned. From that moment on, their fractured relationship was completely restored. This profound shift happened just one month after Kyung began practicing meditation.
This is the story of how a manager, once known for her fierce pride and confrontational style, discovered that the greatest wisdom for resolving human conflict lies in letting go of the ego and finding the courage to admit fault.
The Trap of a Proud Personality
For years, Kyung’s professional life was defined by constant friction. She was a woman of strong opinions, and her rigid belief that she was always “right” made her intensely confrontational.
Whenever disagreements arose, she fought fiercely to win, frequently crushing the other person’s pride in the process. This led to endless arguments and a tense, uncomfortable atmosphere among her coworkers.
“I thought my judgment was right, so the thought that I could be wrong never even crossed my mind,” she reflects. “I believed that admitting I was wrong meant I had lost, so I tried incredibly hard to rationalize my actions. Looking back, I was completely trapped inside myself.”
Her narrow, self-centered mindset meant she was entirely incapable of understanding or empathizing with her colleagues’ feelings. As a result, despite being surrounded by people at work, she felt deeply isolated and lonely.
Discovering the Root of the Conflict
Seeking relief from her internal stress, Kyung turned to meditation. As she looked back on her life and objectively observed her own mind, she came to a painful but liberating realization: all of the relationship problems she had experienced up to that point were her own fault.
The friction wasn’t caused by incompetent coworkers or unfair situations; it was caused by her excessively strong pride.
As she used meditation to systematically discard that self-centered “me,” her personality began to soften. The sharp edges of her impatience and her sudden flares of emotion gradually faded away. As her internal emotional landscape calmed, her external human relationships naturally smoothed out.
The Ultimate Wisdom: Being the First to Yield
Today, Kyung’s approach to workplace conflict is entirely different. When a tense situation arises, she no longer arms herself with rationalizations and defensive arguments. Instead, she immediately says, “I was wrong.”
She discovered that this simple, sincere admission is the greatest wisdom for resolving human conflicts. When you drop your ego and sincerely admit your shortcomings, the other person’s defenses instantly melt away, leaving no room for lingering resentment.
Recently, a slight friction arose during a conversation with a new employee. Instead of pulling rank or defending her position, Kyung immediately apologized: “I don’t think I understood your position. I was wrong.”
The new employee was so moved by this display of humble leadership that they replied, “Manager, no, I think I’m the one who needs to do this meditation.”
From Loneliness to Connection
“I am so grateful that I have become a person who can say, ‘I was wrong,'” Kyung says.
By letting go of the exhausting need to always be right, the hatred she carried toward others completely disappeared, leaving her feeling endlessly comfortable. Once isolated by her own stubborn pride, she now lives feeling the genuine warmth of human connection. She no longer works in a battlefield of egos, but in a community of good people she is profoundly grateful for.
Kyung L.’s 3 Insights on Workplace Harmony
1. The Need to Be “Right” Destroys Relationships “When you are trapped in the belief that your judgment is absolute, you become completely blind to how your words and actions hurt others. The obsession with being ‘right’ is often just your pride trying to protect itself.”
2. Apologizing is Not Losing “I used to think that saying ‘I was wrong’ was a sign of defeat, so I exhausted myself trying to rationalize my bad behavior. In reality, being the first to admit fault is a sign of immense strength and the fastest way to dissolve a conflict.”
3. True Leadership Requires an Empty Ego “When a leader can sincerely apologize to a junior employee, it builds more respect and trust than any defensive argument ever could. Letting go of your ego doesn’t diminish your authority; it makes you a leader people actually want to follow.”
